February 28, 2008

Only Child Parenting - Getting The Balance Right

By Donald Saunders

The only children is frequently perceived as having difficulty in relating to other children, as being spoilt and selfish and as being unable to stand up for himself. In reality this is simply not the case and, while some only children do fit this picture, so do many children from larger families with brothers and sisters.

If fact, research demonstrates that being an only child can have its advantages and a significant number of only children have higher self esteem, better verbal skills, are more highly motivated towards academic achievement and have better relationships with their parents. In a variety of other areas such as leadership, independence, popularity and generosity there is little if any difference between an only child and a child with brothers and sisters.

Only child parenting does however bring with it a number of problems which the parents of an only child must be aware of if they are to strike the right balance between bringing up a child with the skills necessary to thrive as a full member of society and a child who will find it difficult to integrate.

In the modern world we are surrounded by people with whom we must interact whether through our work, socially, through hobbies and sports or merely through the everyday activities of eating out, shopping or walking through the town.

The skills that we need as adults to interact with others need to be learnt at an early age and this is especially important when it comes to only child parenting if you are to make sure that your child is not only given the opportunity to develop these skills, but is also given the right direction and guidance.

It is all too easy to allow an only child to cut himself off from the world and to unwittingly assist in this process. For this reason parents of only children need to take a lead and prepare their child to face the real world in a manner which is frequently not required in larger families.

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